Who is an outgoing person? First of all, this is one to whom communication is a pleasure. The outgoing person does not care who to communicate with, the process itself is interesting to him.
Communicative people are characterized by flexibility in contacts, ability and ability not to get confused when communicating in different situations, self-confidence, they easily adapt to new conditions, are able to successfully negotiate, strive for initiative and leadership in the team.
If you feel that you are not communicative enough, that you often look for an opportunity to avoid the upcoming conversation, if you want to develop your communication skills, listen to the following tips.
1. Appreciate the time of your interlocutor
Each person has certain plans for the day. And if you have a little time to discuss insignificant things and have a friendly conversation, this does not mean that your interlocutor is also positively inclined to talk. He may have urgent matters, a large amount of work, or an important meeting. Your desire to communicate can only cause irritation in the interlocutor. And such emotions do not contribute to the development of friendships. Therefore, before such non-constructive dialogs, always ask if your interlocutor has time for this. Such a respectful attitude will definitely arouse your sympathy and desire to communicate in the future.
2. One conversation - one problem
Some people strive to literally within one short conversation immediately solve a dozen complex issues, each of which must be given special attention. Many problems require careful analysis, reflection and evaluation of various solutions. Therefore, when building a dialogue, try to concentrate on solving only one problematic issue. If you urgently need to cover several topics at once, correctly rank them according to the degree of complexity, importance and emotionality.
3. Learn not only to listen, but also to hear the interlocutor
People who are able to communicate effectively with others are usually laconic. They prefer to listen to the interlocutor, periodically inserting their thoughtful comments or additions. A good interlocutor will not interrupt the speaker, but will try to understand the essence of what they tell him. He never makes hasty decisions. After all, sometimes people need to give a little time to explain the situation and the motives of their actions. Such attention to the interlocutor is one of the most effective tools for building a constructive dialogue.
At the same time, you should avoid a long silence. Otherwise, it may be perceived as a sign that you are not listening to the person you are talking to. Therefore, during the conversation, be sure to show interest, ask questions or make valuable comments to show the person that you are actively participating in the conversation.
4. Phone communication
If you have an important telephone conversation, think over your speech in advance, as well as questions that you must ask. To make it easier to build a conversation, make a plan, noting in it the key points of the upcoming conversation. During a telephone conversation, give the other party time to express their point of view. If you were asked a question that you cannot answer, honestly admit it. Do not deviate from the topic or just be silent in the phone. This will create an unpleasant impression on you.
5. Constructive communication during group conversations
When communicating in a group, many want to amuse themselves by expressing their opinions on each issue, even if their statements have obvious errors or inaccuracies. Therefore, with this form of communication, it is also important to be able to listen to others. During the conversation, write down your ideas and interesting thoughts. And then voice them when the right moment comes or someone from the group speaks directly to you. When organizing group discussions, it is better to set time limits to reduce the performance of people who like to conduct empty conversations.
6. Separate constructive and non-constructive communication
If you want to build friendships with colleagues, then use your free time or lunch breaks. But during working hours it is better to focus on solving important problems. Constructive communication should always be a priority, as your career success depends on it. Non-constructive dialogs should not affect your work, therefore, such communication should occur exclusively during free hours.
Avoid and avoid communication
Do you think that you are quite sociable, but prefer to enter into a dialogue only if the person you are talking to is pleasant and you are in a good mood? If you notice a friend walking towards you and prefer to turn off the road in order to avoid talking with him, if you see someone unfamiliar to you in the public transport window, you prefer to wait for the next bus - all this means that you are not communicative.
In order to develop sociability, try not to avoid casual encounters. Communicate with unfamiliar people or those who are completely unfamiliar to you. So you will develop the skill of sociability.
Learn to enjoy communication
This is one of the main rules for acquiring communication skills. We always set ourselves up for how the planned conversation will go with this or that person. For example, meeting a long-time friend seems uninteresting and very boring, because you know that your interlocutor is a typical bore.
The upcoming conversation with the boss always involves some stiffness and nervousness. Before a conversation that you find unpleasant, you should tune in to the best: remember that you can always change the situation, switch roles with your interlocutor. For example, you don’t really want to listen to your friend’s childhood memories.
Excellent - do not listen, start telling yourself, take control of the situation. Or turn the conversation on another topic that will be of interest to both of you. Turn the upcoming annoying conversation into a pleasant one. Learn how to benefit from your conversations with different people, and communication will become a more exciting event for you.
Try to initiate a conversation
Living in a big city, it’s easy to pretend that you don’t see an old acquaintance with whom you are traveling in the same subway car, or pretend that you did not recognize him. As a rule, downcast eyes indicate your unwillingness to make contact, and this works - they also do not want to communicate with you. But such an adult game of hide and seek makes you experience much more negative emotions than a conversation even with the most undesirable interlocutor. When you are hiding from your friend, you are in a state of expectation, fear: “Did he (a) recognize you? Does he want to talk? ”
In order not to be tormented by such questions and not wait until they come up to you and start talking, it is best to start the conversation yourself, act as the initiator of the dialogue, you will feel that it is quite easy. These are the basics of communicative communication.
Work on your artistry
Sociability of people characterizes them as representatives of society, which are characterized by a wealth of gestures and intonations. The sociable person is an unsurpassed storyteller, an imitator. He has a taste for detail, for a juicy detail, he wants to live a diverse life, because it is so easy for such a person to transform into different social roles, easy to adapt. These people know how to like.
Kill your pessimistic mood
The obligatory quality of any truly sociable person is optimism. If you strive to become a master of communicative communication, develop communication skills, but at the same time you have pessimistic moods, it’s just right to ask yourself the question “How to become an optimist?” Pessimism, as a rule, does not lead to anything good, much less contributes to the development of sociability. Smile All is well! People respond much better to a smile than to a sullen face.
Not all people are born with a penchant for developing sociability. The main teacher of such skills, of course, is life itself. In the process of acquiring life and professional experience, a person learns to communicate, communicate with people, and effectively build the necessary connections.
But there are people who do not have sufficient communication skills. Nowadays, everything can be learned, it would be only desire. Specialized literature, participation in professional trainings on effective communication techniques and daily trainings in communication with others will help to be a “communication master”.